What has art done for you lately?

Back in January, the Sydney festival gave anyone the chance to see their name in lights across the top of the Australian Museum a stone's throw from our house. American artist John Baldessari's exhibit "reflects the changing cult of celebrity in modern society and recalls Andy Warhol's prediction that in the future everyone will have their 15 minutes of fame" according to the Sydney Festival website. All you had to do was enter your name on the website and wait for them to let you know about what time your name would appear. 


Here's mine:

Yes, I became famous at exactly 6:47am so we decided to take a screen shot from the site's webcam rather than drag ourselves out of bed early to take a photo. 


This is probably the coolest thing that art has ever done for me.

NYE 2010: Santa Barbara

In an attempt to maintain the tradition of spending each New Year's Eve in a new location, Mickey and I wound up in Santa Barbara on the last evening of 2010. We had "done" LA and San Francisco in prior years and didn't wish to leave California so we decided on the lovely seaside town of Santa Barbara, a place known for a once-legendary Halloween party, but not for any particular NYE festivities.

And that was fine by me, because I'm one of those who believe that NYE is always overhyped and disappointing. You could dress up and get tickets for a fancy evening at a restaurant or club, watch some fireworks and hope for good music and good company. OR, you could buck tradition and start your own. I've decided that my favorite NYE traditions are a night in with friends full of games, making top ten of 2010 lists but not getting past number three, a dip in the hot tub and s'mores at midnight. At least that's what I did this year and hope to do again on subsequent NYEs.

Of course a night in with friends was appealing to me because "in" was the gorgeous, cozy holiday house we rented for the weekend and "friends" were five of my favorite people on the planet: Mickey, my dear friends Andrew and Alyssa, Nic and his girlfriend Kat. We spent plenty of happy hours playing Dance Central on the xbox 360 Kinect, the 'it' gift for last Christmas. Poor Nic couldn't make it to midnight because of a brief episode of stomach flu, but he was in fine form the next day when we went wine tasting.

This was one of my most enjoyable NYEs. In fact, the only part I would not do over again is watch the prerecorded Snooki ball drop on the Jersey Shore at the stroke of midnight. I'll stick to smooching my sweetie and s'mores.

CleveLAND

Directly after Christmas, Mickey and I flew to Ohio to spend some quality time with his family and by quality time I mean eating-intensive visits with family structured entirely outside of normal mealtimes. "Please don't say we're going to Aunty's place. I might barf because I'm so full" is sort of the sentiment after two and a half days of breakfast, brunch, lunch, afternoon tea and dinner visits. Of course, each of these meals (even breakfast) concludes with dessert, too. And choosing not to eat would offend the host, so gluttony is the only option for my visits to Ohio.

Our joke of the trip was saying "this week was sponsored by Jaipur Junction" in a singsongy advertising voice. The size of our gatherings required some catering because even the most tireless little aunty couldn't be asked to throw together a meal for twenty and Cleveland's favorite Indian restaurant Jaipur Junction was the takeout of choice.

The highlight of any trip to Ohio is spending time with our niece Priya and twin nephews Isaac and Isaiah. They're boisterous, but ridiculously adorable. We only see them once a year and it was delightful to observe their budding personalities. Isaac follows Priya, the loving big sister (and only person other than their momma who can tell the twins apart reliably) while Isaiah dances to a different beat. Though he can barely talk, he expressed his preferred clothing and shoe brand to his mother thusly: "Mom, Nike shirt." This cracks me up because it's adorable, but also sort of terrifies me. Does Nike know that their Swoosh is recognized by two year olds?

When not half heartedly stuffing Jaipur Junction's butter chicken down our throats, the tykes and I played Candy Land and Chutes and Ladders. Good times.

Bowling in the new year

It's April, but I'm still writing about the Christmas/New Year holidays. Yes, I'm a bit behind.

If our holiday trip to the states had a subtitle it might be: American Bowling Alley Tour 2010/2011. We literally went bowling four times over the course of the holiday, first at our beloved 4th Street Bowl (aka Ghetto Bowl) in San Jose, then again in Diamond Bar and Parma, Ohio and finally somewhere in Ventura County enroute to LAX.

Though Mickey's a good bowler, I can't say that we're particularly attached to the sport (we own neither our own shoes nor ball). So, why did we go bowling four times over the holiday? Well, there actually is some logic to it. When you get together with family and friends over winter holidays, you can only go out for meals so many times. At some point, you want to do something mildly active, but the weather doesn't always permit it. Going to the movies is a great option, but it's not very social.

And that's when bowling becomes your go-to holiday activity with friends and family. It's indoor, bowling alleys are everywhere in the US, they're cheap and they have something for everyone. Competitive and/or athletic? Stick to the bowling. Can't stand bowling and/or your family? Well, the bowling alley probably has a bar. Teetotaling or entertaining little ones? They probably also have a jukebox, arcade and nachos. See? You just can't go wrong with bowling.

After touring the four bowling alleys, I noticed a slightly disappointing trend, attempts to renovate and modernize. You may wonder why a bowling connoisseur such as myself isn't excited about replacing the clunky CRTs with flat screens at bowling alleys across America and it's because 'slightly dingy' and 'retro' are the descriptors for which every bowling alley should aim.

Have you ever been bowling abroad? I've been bowling in Zurich and Sydney and the bowling alleys there are all wrong: bright colors, loud music, high prices, menus with items like sliders and satay skewers and way too clean. No, if you ask me, plastic seats, cheesy graphics and cheap cocktails are part of the American bowling alley's charm.

Christmas Part II: It just wouldn't be Christmas without...

Some of my expat friends spent gorgeous Christmases here in Sydney on the beach enjoying seafood barbecues and summer sun. Though paradise to many, a beachy Christmas away from family strikes me as terribly lonely and inauthentic. I guess I'm just not as adventurous and adaptable as my friends who bravely forge new Christmas traditions of beach bonfires and mango margaritas.

To me, there's only one Christmas. It's celebrated in LA with my mom, brother and Mickey and it just wouldn't be Christmas without...

1. a fabulous family party at Aunt Tina's with a bit of glamor, lots of cousins and an impromptu talent show - The Mallinson, Rennie and Pakfar clans used to gather on Christmas day when we were little, but now that our families are growing, we generally get together at my Aunt Tina's house in Northridge during the weekend before Christmas for a dinner party. We have some good-looking family members, so mom and I stepped up our game this year by getting our makeup done at MAC before the party. I used to be intimidated by the makeup artists at MAC because their own faces often express the drag queen/Lady Gaga-spectrum of their talent, but they're perfectly capable of creating normal party-pretty looks without a touch of Marilyn Manson. Anyway, it was lovely to catch up with all my cousins, especially the Oettinger contingent from Texas who I hadn't seen for several years. Aunt Tina unfailingly serves up a fantastic feast and this year was no exception. The saffron sour cherry rice, a Persian dish this year served up by Uncle Hamid's mom, is always a highlight. We were entertained by seven year old Brandon who sang Justin Bieber's hit song "Baby" twice. Though he was good, my cousin Brittany's three year old son Charlie's effort to literally push Brandon out of the way and then sing the same song was even better.
2. taking turns opening presents on Christmas morning and wishing I had maybe gotten dressed and put on makeup because Mickey's taking a ton of pictures - On many Christmas mornings of my youth, my brother would awaken me and our parents at around 6:30am. There were plenty of Christmases where the whole thing would be over by 8:15am. Nic's still an early riser and jet lag contributed to another early start to Christmas morning. Some families tone down their Christmas celebrations and the quantity of gifts once the children leave their childhood and teen years, but my family remains remarkably generous and the number of gifts under the tree seem to increase as the years go on. This is also because our family has grown to include Tom and his family, Mickey and his family and Kat, of course. In one critical way, I've matured enough to realize that it truly is better to give than receive. I'm rising early not because I can't wait to see my haul, but because I'm eager to see how everyone else likes the gifts I gave them. This year's highlights were the xBox 360 Kinect with Dance Central game for Nic and Kat and a tortilla press for Mickey. I was thrilled with several generous gifts from my family: clothes from Mom, a signed cookbook from Nic and Kat and games, music and more from Mickey.  
3. my childhood stocking and the luscious chocolate orange inside it - I sometimes feel sorry for families who hang the traditional red felt stockings with cheap white faux fur trim because my own stocking is so special to me. It's white and green with a delicate quilted pattern; I've had it since birth and my mom recently had my name embroidered on it. Every Christmas I find it filled with a number of small, delightfully useful things: cute pocket Kleenex, Chapstick, socks and a magazine. Without fail, it also includes a chocolate orange fashioned like a real orange complete with sections and pith. You know the type; you have to knock it firmly against a hard surface to separate the sections.  
4. exchanging gag/ugly gifts with my cousin Holly - We initiated this tradition when I brought home my first lot of teacher Christmas gifts. Bless their little hearts, but the gifts I received from my darling first graders were... well, exactly the types of trinkets that a six year old would find beautiful. I saw my fair share of red and white stuffed animals, silk roses with glue meant to look like dew/rain drops and lots of porcelain, glass and faux-crystal figurines. It sounds cruel, but I found most of these figurines profoundly ugly and perplexing and I would literally cry laughing while imagining the thought process that went into them. A porcelain ballerina pig with a real tulle mini tutu and Dreamsicle-esque flower crown was particularly memorable and inspired me to share this peculiar joy with Holly. Now that I no longer teach, Alyssa generously donated her "best" gift to our cause. It was a mermaid figurine with a glittery bikini top and inexplicable belly chain. Priceless.
5. going to the movie theater on Christmas day and choosing a film to suit the whole family - Our family are big on movies. For some of us, the Academy Awards are a holiday on par with Easter or the Fourth of July. Finding a movie that's appropriate for all of us (and that most of us haven't already seen) can be a challenge, but we found a winner this year in The King's Speech with Colin Firth.

It was a beautiful, happy Christmas and I'm so glad I was able to spend it at home.